How To Get Over A Boy

After reading this book, I delved into the reviews again and was suprised to see all these negative thoughts on the book. I had seen these reviews originally when purchasing the book but decided to give it a try regardless. In my opinion, all these negative reviews either majorly missed the point or they clearly "already have" this information. Which then makes me wonder why they feel they would need this book to begin with. The book answers the question of "how to get over a boy" by saying many many different good things. It comes from a feminist stand point, so it's main take away is this - you can learn a lot of things from relationships after theyre said and done, but the biggest you can learn is that you have inherent value that cant be taken away by another person (or boy). And allowing your mind to focus on this boy or person you no longer have in your life keeps you from seeing that value yourself, which may lead to more hard future relationships. It then goes on to give tips on empowering yourself and seeing that value, which may be hard to see if you have had hard unhealthy relationships in the past. This empowerment will allow you to realize that anyone who doesn't value you doesn't deserve your physical or emotional time. Many people said that this book has a "one mans trash is another mans treasure" attitude. Which, in my mind, makes me wonder if they speed read this entire book. There is a whole chapter on seeing your own value, not waiting on a man or anyone else to see your value, and to realise that you are an amazing person all on your own. That another person compliments your greatness, but doesnt make it. This book mentions men quite a lot, because for a long of teens and young women, society teaches that our value only comes from being viewed as pretty or interesting by men. The text slowly tries to point out that you are important and special, regardless if there is a person there noticing and saying so or not. Summary: So yes, men are mentioned a lot, because it's in the title. "How to get over a boy" isn't really about getting over one specific boy or man, but really the ideology that all men should be so important in our minds to begin with. It's getting over *all* men, to become the best version of yourself. Overall a wonderful read, and as a 22 year old female that grew up in a religious household pushing patriarchal ideals down my throat, this was honestly a massive eye opener. I would highly reccomend to anyone of any gender. Women need to be empowered, men need to see how women are feeling and perhaps change accordingly, and everyone else can simply enjoy the new ideas presented. :)

Chidera Eggerue is incredible. This book is like a secret treasure chest of ideas. I've long felt like the victim of bad people and circumstances in my relationships and wondered how other women make it work so that they feel real support from their partners. I love that this book starts at the foundation - with yourself! You have to teach others how to treat you by how you treat yourself -- it sounds basic, but it's hard to actualize, and this book breaks it down and makes it more approachable. I bought an extra and send it to my friend who was in an abusive relationship, and she finally was able to leave. This book means so much I can't even express it. Life-changing.

I’m 21 and last summer was my first experience ‘talking’ to a guy. Needless to say, it didn’t work out. I was lost for a few months and I saw this book in a photo on Twitter, believe it or not, and I thought it was something I needed to read. This book put a lot into perspective for me and I enjoyed reading it. I learned a lot and I do plan to reread it.

This book was amazing. I finished it in a day and a half. A must read!!

Wished I have been introduced to her ideas during my teenage years. Definitely recommend. If you're debating which book to get of hers, I would chose What a Time to be Alone, but if you can afford both, they are well worth the read.

This book and "What a Time to Be Alone" completely changed my perspective on dating and life more broadly and were lifesavers during 2020 after coming out of my worst breakup ever. Do yourself and your girlfriends a favor by getting everyone a copy of Chidera's work, reading it, letting it rock your worlds, and reading it again. Don't even bother with Florence Given's knock-off work. Chidera is the real deal. Period.

Chidera has a beautiful and transformative way of speaking far past the ideas of “moving on” or “being single.” She speaks to the heart of owning our worth and putting ourselves first—before men and the systems that uphold much of their toxicity, and despite who the world tells us we should be to be “worthy.” I can’t recommend her work enough.

This book is a lifesaver if you are struggling with letting go of people who cause you pain read this novel.

But it now! Buy it, read it in one go because you will not be able to put it down and then read it again and again and again. That’s what I did. I pick this book up atleast once a week to either have a quick read over or to find the part that relates to me in that moment. This book is like a letter from the big sister I never had. Chidera is a QUEEN and if this book helps you to see the world and yourself even a little bit like she does then you’ll benefit. Her feminist ways are so feminist they dont fit with the theoretical modern feminism we all preach but don’t/can’t practice.

So easy to understand and beautiful illustration etc

I absolutely loved reading this book. Such a nourishing and refreshing read. I found it to be a wonderful reminder of the beauty, importance and sheer necessity of choosing yourself, especially as a woman of color living in a white supremacist patriarchal culture. Totally recommend it, even if you're not trying to get over anyone at the moment. Thank you for writing this Chidera!

I read it a long time ago so I don’t remember exactly details but I do remember it helped me, it was easy to read, the layout and design is cool, and I felt good about it

With her second book, Chidera again created a really beautiful piece of art and literature, where she takes the reader by the hand and empowers them through her writing. It is not necessarily a book for people that struggle from a bad relationship or just broke up with someone. It rather teaches the reader to love and put themselves first instead of always prioritizing other people. It gave me personally a lot of energy to have difficult conversations and focus on myself more - benefitting my relationship, at the same time, greatly.